690 Miles is what I ran in 2018. For a runner, that’s not much but for me, those 690 miles mean a lot!  

I didn’t consistently run for more than half of the year for a couple of reasons.  One being neuroma in both my feet made it super painful to run and even to walk some days and two the grief I was still feeling from the losses I’ve had kept me from moving on.  But there came a point where the pain in my feet was more tolerable than the pain in my heart so I signed up for another half marathon and began training again!

Exercise is always good for you.  Not just physically either!  It’s good for your soul.  When I am running the pain and the worries of the world slip away and I get lost in the run.  When I am running, I listen to worship music and often times I can feel the Holy Spirit speaking to my spirit.  I have clarity about so many things and learn something new each time I run.  It’s hard to explain but even though the running is hard and painful my spirit is still to listen to the Lord.  (I know that probably doesn’t make sense but that’s the best way I know to explain it.)

I remember going into 2018 thinking this year has to be better.  I had so much loss in 2017 and I just didn’t think it could be worse than what I had to go through that year. Then in February of 2018, I lost my daddy to cancer and found myself in the same situation I was in just 7 months before when I lost the man I had been in a relationship with for 11 years.  Once again I had lost someone who made my world go around.  Someone who was there for me always! And when both my girls moved out, I was completely alone for the first time in a very long time. Grief and loneliness became my identity and I let it control most of my days.  I struggled every day to find peace and healing.  I struggled to hold onto my faith some days if I am completely honest with you.  

The beauty of it all though was that the Lord never left my side.  He never gave up on me.  I look back now and realize even more how true those statements are.  He walks with me every single day.  All I ever need to do is turn to Him.  There were days when I didn’t and those days were the longest and hardest days of all.  Time does not heal all wounds, my friends, Jesus does!  The days when I stayed in His presence, stayed focused on Him, those were the days that I could feel real healing!  It’s a two-way street.  We have to draw near to Him and He will draw near to us. (James 4:8)

I know today many of you are making your New Year’s Resolutions and making your lists of what you want to accomplish this year.  People view a new year as a new hope.  It’s a blank book just waiting for you to start writing a new story.

Do I have goals for this new year? 

You betcha! 

Like most people, I want to get back into shape.  I had lost 45 pounds in 2016 and was in the best shape of my life but after losing Timothy in 2017 and then my daddy in 2018, I’ve gained about 20 of it back.  Everyone kept telling me it was ok, I had been through so much.  But no excuses, it’s time to take care of myself the way God intends.  It’s time to take care of myself not only spiritually but physically as well.  I’ve set some new running goals for 2019 as well so there are more half marathons in my future! (I’m already signed up for 3) I want that number of 690 miles to be way bigger this year! 

This morning I read the blog post I wrote last year, “New Year’s Resolutions…You Only Need One“, and it still holds true for me this year.  The most important thing I can commit to is spending more time with Jesus! I need to be more intentional with my quiet time and with my relationship with the Lord. He is the most faithful friend I have and I need to be faithful to Him!  My identity is in Christ and not my circumstances.  My hope needs to be anchored in Him!

That’s really all any of us need because if we are growing in Him, then everything else in our life falls into place just as He has designed for us.  The Bible tells us He has a plan for us. (Jeremiah 29:11) To know that plan, we must be in His Word and in His presence.

I woke up super early and had to get to the computer to write this out so I know someone needs to hear this today.  Someone is looking for something today as they start out this new year.  Someone reading this right now is looking for more in 2019. 

I don’t have the answers you are looking for and I can’t make your hurt go away.  Believe me when I say that I wish I did and I wish I could!  What I do have for you is a God who knows you, who loves you, who wants what’s best for you!  All you have to do is turn to Him and say, “You are all I need Lord.  Live in me.  Guide my steps.  Heal my heart.  Help me be more like Jesus every single day!” 

He will!  He is so faithful!  His grace is enough!  His love is enough!  He is enough!

Will you commit to Him in the New Year?