Have you ever just been stuck in “Survivor Mode?” You know the one where you have to remind yourself to breathe. You just go through the motions of the day not remembering how you got from one spot to the next, and at the end of the day you are just happy you got through it. Just knowing you have to go through it again the next day exhausts you.
I’ve been stuck like this for a while now. If you’ve been following my blog you already know that in 7 months I had 3 very significant losses: my boyfriend of 11 years, my biological mother, and my sweet daddy. Losing the two men that mattered most to me though has come to define me, has become my identity, has from time to time put me in “survivor mode”. I know that my identity is in Christ but still, this is what has happened and I want to be honest with you.
The weather lately has affected my mood as well because I haven’t been able to run. Running clears my head. When I run I don’t think of anything else but the run. The problems and the storms fade away for that time and I get lost in the miles listening to my worship music. There are times when I am running that the Lord speaks very clearly to my spirit.
One day there was a long enough break in the rain that I could get out in the streets and get the 5 miles done that I needed that day. (I had been training for my second Half Marathon which I just completed a couple of weeks ago!) While I was running I felt the Lord saying to me that He made me for much more than just being a “Survivor”. He made me to be an “Overcomer”! He was there running with me, beside me, ready to carry me if I needed Him too but telling me that together I could overcome this feeling of being stuck in my grief. With Him, I could move forward into what He has for me.
I’m not saying that you shouldn’t be in survivor mode right now. There is nothing wrong with it. You should be proud that you got up this morning, that you were able to put one step in front of the other, that you made it to work, that you made it through the day… but there comes a time when just surviving is not enough anymore. If we fully believe in the Lord, then there comes a time when we have to fully surrender it to Him and step into being an “Overcomer”.
The next morning I simply prayed, “Lord give me something today. Anything. I just need something.” And He did. He gave me peace. The kind of peace that surpasses all understanding. I don’t know why I have had to endure so much in such a short amount of time but I know if I just surrender it all to Him and keep my focus on Him, He will fill me with His presence and His joy.
His Word tells us we will have trouble but He has overcome the world (John 16:33) and with Him by our side, we can too!
We all have a calling on our lives. We are all meant to do more for Him. We are meant to do more than just “Survive”. We are meant to “Overcome” so that He can be glorified through us. What a testimony we all have waiting to share as we step into His presence and be “Overcomers!” Let Him help you overcome today!
